Ahem... Your Autonomy is Showing

Why do I try to do stuff on my own?

It's so aggravating to me when I go through life for a while, make mistakes, then have to go back to God for a fresh start when I should have been with Him the whole time.

For some reason, as my daily life goes on, I just forget that God's right here with me. I talk with people, make decisions (not always good ones), and go about my business as if God weren't even existant, much less present.

Normally I don't even realize it until I screw up and realize that I had "left God" a while ago.

I can't do it on my own! Why do I try?

In a way, I realize that this is the basis of all sin: thinking that you are self-sufficient enough to do what YOU want; thinking that YOU know what is best.

On the other hand, the basis of salvation is rejecting autonomy and saying that you CAN'T do it on your own. That you NEED God to pick you up and renew you.

As depressing as it is sometimes when I repeatedly go against God and try to do things on my own, it is very refreshing to come back to Him when He has His arms wide open. No matter how many times I screw up and need to come humbly back to Him saying that I made a mess of things, He remains loyal and sets me back on my feet.

In James, it says that we should pray for one another, so I'll pray that you guys can remember God and your need for Him all the time, and I hope that you'll pray for me and each other, too.

I think this song applies to what I'm trying to say. The lyrics are pretty powerful.

Still Here Waiting
Todd Agnew

It's cold outside
Or is that just the chill I feel inside from standing here
Steeping in my shame
I can't deny
I'm surrounded by the very thing You freed me from
That's why I can't come home
I don't know where I turned around
From chasing what I always found completed me
More than I could dream
I don't know why I can't remain
Safe here where I always came to meet with you
And You always met with me
And You're still here waiting
I fail to see
Why You'd still be waiting to forgive me
After all that I have done
But I cannot say
That one time I returned and You had turned away
Your love never fails
You say, Come home and You'll be there
I can run into Your arms

Thanks, God, for ALWAYS being faithful!

Oneify

Why can't we all just get along?

I've been reading a web site called Way of Life that was linked to on Dave's blog. It really got my blood boiling.

How can a sect of Christians be so "anti-everyone that doesn't hold our exact beliefs"?

How is the global Body of Christ, full of diversity, supposed to be used to accomplish His purpose when we're too busy slinging mud at one another?

Some of my best Christian relationships are full of areas of belief where we don't fully agree. It's wonderful to have friends and acquaintances of other denominations, especially when the differences are set aside and the similarities are focused on.

I'm absolutely sure that my set of beliefs aren't exactly correct on every issue, so I make sure to be open-minded when I meet and discuss these things with other Christians that have different opinions. I'm fairly certain that no one's theology is exactly right, so why do we let it cause rifts and divisions between us?

My beliefs on certain issues, ie: predestination, have changed a few times over the last 4 years. As I studied God's Word and discussed it with my brothers and sisters, I've allowed my beliefs to be molded. I'm really trying to not be staunch in any of my minor doctrinal issues when I'm discussing or reading the Bible. Dave has recently said in GEW that the Bible should shape you and mold you whenever you read it. Too often, I approach the Bible with my beliefs already set so firmly in my mind that I twist the text to say what I WANT it to say so I feel the most comfortable.

So, if we can admit that we most likely don't have all of our doctrine and theology exactly correct, there should be no problem with joining together with the rest of the Body to fulfill our duties here: Represent Christ and His Kingdom to the world.

I'd like to think that we can do that as a group of Christians a lot better than as a group of Baptists or Presbyterians or Episcopalians.

I've heard teachings of a Unity with Diversity, and I see that illustrated in the trinity. Three distinct persons united into one God. If we're supposed to be image-bearers, shouldn't we also be distinct persons who unity as a single body for His purpose?

Therefore, as they say in the Pepsi One commercial, ONEIFY.

Ladder 41 and Other Randomness

Jambo.

It's been a looooooooooooooooooooooong weekend.

Earlier in the week we watched Ladder 41(+8) at my house. It was a pretty good movie, but a little sad. Joaquin (pronounced Wha(hacking furball)ckeen) Phoenix is a good actor.

Friday night Jeremy and Keith's Jr. High small groups had an all night war game at the church. It was a ton of fun, and it was a great chance to get to know the students because Keith has asked me to lead a Sunday School class during the first service.

*Disclaimer the following events of Saturday happened while I was very low on sleep and very high on Vault*

*P.S. Some very shameless radio station promotion may occur*

After my two hours of sleep following the war game, I got up, showered, and headed off to the Air Fair. I had won four free tickets from the greatest station in the world, JQ99.

(Speaking of JQ, Brian Nelson is the coolest DJ!)

So, I went with Sarah, David, and my brother that morning to see the festivities. We met up with the Encks and had a good time hanging out and watching the planes.

After the show, we spent two hours commuting to the Encks house for dinner (most of that time was spent in the parking lot). The Encks made us chicken and bratwursts, and we couldn't turn down a free meal. After dinner, Jennie and Dallas came over to play a very violent game of Lemonade Straws (aka Water Spoons).

That night I ended my 38 hour streak with only two hours of sleep.

Sunday, we had a mega-service chock full of African words that we don't know the meaning of. (I just ended my sentence with a preposition, and I don't care). Afterwards, we had a baptism at Lake Calvary (see: Gross looking pond outside of church) and KFC for the church picnic. Ryan and I competed in the egg toss, and I succeeded in getting egg in his hair and hands. Yessssssssssssssss.

Sunday night we went to Hoffmaster to play Ultimate Frisbee. The Kramers invited us over for pizza after the park closed, so we all changed at our respective homes and made the confusing trek to their house. There we played mafia and enjoyed our pizza and each other's company. I got home pretty late, still not fully recovered from the virtually non-existant sleep I got on Friday.

So, what did I learn from all of this?

I learned that Cade likes his bacon cooked, just like Devin.

Concrete Jesus says "Hello"

This is a 62 foot statue of Jesus outside of Solid Rock Church in Monroe, OH. We passed him on the way to Cincinnati during Senior Sneak.

What do you guys think about him?

Paul and I think it would be a great idea to put one on the roof of our church. It's hand would be animated and would beckon the people driving by.

"I want you!"

Equality, I say!!!

This is a sad testament to the still present inequalities among the genders.

I'm sure that this man will be sad.

Yoopers

Yoopers are funny people. For those of you not familiar with the terminology, a yooper is someone that lives in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. They can often be found fishing, hunting, and driving around in their trucks.

My grandparents are yoopers now. They've lived on Neebish Island for quite a few years now, and you can see how they've changed. They commute to many places on four-wheelers. They attend regular euchre tournaments. Going into town is a big ordeal that requires great timing for the ferry schedule.

Yoopers really know each other well. The sense of community on the island is strong. The 55 residents that are there through the winter have a strong connection with each other. They take care of one another's needs. They greet one another. They accept one another...

Hmm....

Sounds like how the church should be. I think the great sense of community comes from the lack of advanced technology. Technology often times gives us more and more excuses to not interact with real, living, breathing people. I think we'd all do better with a little less technology.

I was reminded of the great community formed during the ultimate "no technology" experience: Survivor (not the TV show, but the youth group trip).

After we departed from Neebish island yesterday afternoon, we took a short detour to a patch of land nestled between Hessel and Cedarville. I wanted to see the Rudd's property where I have so many great memories one more time. I was ready to introduce myself to whatever branch of the family was using the cabin that week, but when we pulled into the driveway, the chain going across it was blocking our path. I knew that no one would mind if I just walked around for a short time, so I removed the chain, and we drove down the never-ending driveway. I got out and walked over to Rock Island where I took a couple of pictures. I found the stick that we used (not very effectively) in the slingshot challenge last year. I was flooded with a lot of memories in the short time we stayed there.

I was glad I got the chance to see it one last time. It culminated what I learned or re-realized this weekend: Community is achieved best when technology isn't getting in the way.

So, how do I live that as I sit in my living room typing on a computer with no wires coming out of it, while I listen to my dad talk on the cordless phone, with the TV muted in the background, while my brother plays a computer game?

Tough question...

Field Trips!

Dan, Sarah, Steve, Shannon, Lorna, Jennie, and I went on a field trip today! We went to go see Charlie and the Chocolate Factory in IMAX. We agreed that it was a good idea to hijack the Goshen bus and pick up some Keenagers for the journey, but in the end, we decided that a criminal record isn't something we desire.

It was a great movie. Very well done, and there were some really great performances. One of the most insignificant characters, Grandma Georgina, stole the show.

Afterward, we went to Panera Bread for lunch. We all crowded around a couple of tables and eagerly scarfed down the delicious food.

When I got home I found out that I'm going on ANOTHER "field trip" tomorrow morning. My family and I had originally thought about spending the day in Detroit for my grandma's birthday, but when her car broke down and she wouldn't be able to come from Neebish Island to Detroit, we decided against it. Then today, we changed our minds about visiting her, so we'll be leaving early in the morning to take the 6 hour trip to the middle of nowhere. There's a small chance that we'll pull up in the Rudd's property for a quick look. I hope I don't freak out some faction of the Rudds that I don't know.

The disappointing part of the trip is that I'll miss being able to present to the church what we learned in Chicago. I'll also be missing the slide show with great pictures from our trip. Dave, is there any chance you can e-mail me the powerpoint presentation?

I'll most likely return in time for GEW, so I'll see y'all there.

I feel like I'm in 6th grade again.

There's My Quan-i!

For those of you that didn't go to Chicago, this is the infamous Quan that you may have heard mention of in mine and others' blogs. Elaina took this picture and a lot of others that can be found on Laura's xanga.

I started reading The Chronicles of Narnia since it's been referenced in the Conversations Bible Study. So far, I've really enjoyed it. I need to head to the library to get some more of the books since the only one we had here at home was The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe.

Being that it is Bargain Night at the already cheap Plaza 1 & 2, I went to go see Kingdom of Heaven with my mom, little brother, and Dan. That really is a great movie (It's no Return of the King, but it's good). (And I did notice how much Orlando Bloom looks like Steve Geisel).

Tomorrow starts the Lunch Bible study for the final time. It'll be at Ponderosa on Apple at noon. and we're studying Philemon. I know I'm double-dipping in the college and high school Bible studies, but this is really the final thing I can do with the high school group.

I've got to be getting to sleep soon (I know, weird concept before midnight in the summer).

Aloha (That means hello and good-bye).

Today Seemed Like a Dream

Today.

Started as a normal Sunday. Got up, showered, dressed, and went to church. Heard that Dave had an "announcement" to make. I was pretty sure I knew what it was, and I did. Dave is going to be changing positions. He will no longer be our Pastor of Student Ministries, but instead our Pastor of Spiritual Formation, whatever that means. The position seems sort of unclear at the moment, but it is still a little ways off before the transfer will happen. At first glance, "Pastor of Spiritual Formation" sounds like a great title for Pastor David. He has left me with the impression that he really has some ideas and goals for our church and the church in general that need to be heard, and this seems like it will put him him the position to voice those and carry them out. In that sense, I am happy because I know that Dave will do a great job with his new role.

I am also nostalgic today. I've thought back on a lot of great memories from these last four years. Thoughts of Fireside Chats, early morning roller-skating, Tribal Counsels, Elephant Jokes, Lessons of Oreos and Therefores, The Anti-Madagascar Society in America, Senior Sneak, Chicago, monster calves, "if who you are, is who you were...", mafia games, 15 passenger vans (with trailers), conversations at Barnes and Noble, team devotions on Survivor, rapping in the van, rocking out to BSB, brainteasers, the Dave Show, Zobmondo, 3 Relationships, and just joking around during down times.

I know I'm all graduated, and this doesn't directly affect me, but I'm concerned mostly for all of my friends that are in high school. I've seen the youth group grow by leaps and bounds during these last four years. Dave is such a good teacher and a good friend to everyone. He teaches at a deep level. He encourages us and builds relationships. I've seen other youth pastors that don't even compare to Dave. I'm afraid that we'll end up with someone that won't help our group grow. I'm afraid of the unknown.

The position Dave is taking is good for the church and it's good for Dave, so I'm incredibly happy for that, don't get me wrong, but I don't know what it will do to the youth group.

If only there were a way to make two Daves...

The Seemingly Impossible

This morning, after much coaxing from our mother, my little brother and I cleaned the basement. Since we don't have a garage or an attic, the basement in our house is the main storage facility for all of our junk. It had gotten pretty bad down there.

Very few people know that the other half of our basement has a TV, sectional, foosball table, and a boccerball table. It would actually be an alright place to hang out if it didn't have such a tendency to get all full of junk.

With a few hours of work, the basement is now presentable. It felt good to finish it, and with a new lightbulb or two, it will be pretty enjoyable.

Saw War of the Worlds on Tuesday night with Dallas and Sarah. It fell short of my expectations, but it wasn't a bad movie. The next movie that I've set my sights on is Fantastic Four. If anyone reading wants to go see it, give me a call. (By the way, I think I'm currently funding a new wing of the Cinema Carousel)

A handful of our youth group helped out at the Senior Luncheon yesterday for the Keenagers. It went well. Even though some of the clean up work wasn't fun to do, when you're with friends there is always a way to make it fun.

To finish off the randomness that is this post, here is a memorable quote from the week in Chicago:

"How old you is?"
"I didn't do nothing!"
"I said 'How old you is?'"
"Oh, six."

Where's My Quan-i?

The Chicago Trip went great. We all had our stereotypes completely shattered. For every preconceived notion we had going into the trip, we met at least one person that defied it.

From highly educated homeless men, to Pakistanis with Computer engineering degrees that can't find a good job, to homeless grandmas that look normal and are working hard, to the coolest kids that live in the poorest environments.

The kids we worked with at WECAN ranged in age from 4-12. You can see that the younger the kids are, the more hopes and dreams they have. Despite high aspirations, so many of them won't have the opportunities to live their dreams. Most of them aren't in poverty because of laziness, but because of truly bad situations. It hurt so much to leave them because we loved them so hard during the week, and we knew we were leaving them with a very uncertain future. The odds are against them, and we really don't know how they will end up. We can only hope and pray that their situations will change and that the groups that they will see for the rest of the summer will be able to water and harvest the seeds that we planted.

I really grew attached to a 6 year old boy named Quan. He is so innocent and hopeful. He wants to be a police officer like his dad when he grows up, and he loves video games. He doesn't exactly fit in with the other kids, and I hope that doesn't lead him to join a gang. When you look at him you want to laugh because his eyes never open all the way, but that just adds to his personality. I really miss him, but I hope that he won't just remember having fun with me. I want him to remember that Jesus really does love Him and will never walk out of his life. While I was there, he taught me some "believer songs," so I know He goes to church. I pray that he'll continue to attend so that he will accept Christ when he understands fully.

Another kid we met was Devin. He had four long braids coming out of the side of his head, and many (including me) mistook him for a girl. He gets made fun of a lot, but he knows how to take a punch. Like Quan, he is also a social anomaly. Devin got really attached to Cade. He seemed to take our departure well. I hope he turns out alright. He's definitely a unique person.

There are so many other people that we crossed paths with this week, but those two stand out the most. The uncertainty of their future is scary, and it is very unlikely that we will ever see them again. They really blessed me this week, and I hope that I was able to bless them with a glimpse of the unconditional love of Christ.

I don't really understand how the lessons I learned in Chicago will affect how I serve God here in Muskegon, but I definitely don't want it to just turn into another memory in the back of my mind.